Why do we disagree with others?

This is the crux of the problem. When people disagree with us, their disagreement not only influences the validity of our beliefs, but it calls into question our personal identities—the kind of people we want to believe that we are. This is why even ostensibly meaningless differences, such as which sports team a person favors, can rankle.

Is it natural to fail to understand where others are coming from?

Here’s the rub: It is natural enough to fail to understand where another person is coming from, because we can never really know for sure, but it is another to assume that they are simply wrongheaded. But if there is any doubt that this is the way that many disagreements are interpreted, the present political climate should dispel them.

Do you have crazy thoughts and fantasies you don’t want others to know?

After all, people have all kinds of crazy thoughts and fantasies that they wouldn’t want others to know about. But the downside is that it makes it so easy to disapprove of others whose preferences, values, and behaviors differ from our own.

Should we expose ourselves to the beliefs of people we disagree with?

But, even if people do expose themselves to beliefs they disagree with, that won’t necessarily make things better. More exposure to the other side can sometimes backfire and cause people to become more entrenched in their own beliefs.

What is disagreement in organizations really about?

For groups within organizations, disagreement may really be about a power struggle: which group should be able to make decisions about which things, and what magnitude of resources should be allocated to each group?

Why are we afraid to read opinions we disagree with?

A desire for identity consistency may help explain why we can be so uncomfortable engaging with opinions that challenge our beliefs. One recent study found that we are even willing to give up the chance to earn money to avoid reading opinions we disagree with.