Q&A

Can a trauma bond be real love?

Can a trauma bond be real love?

If you’re wondering whether it’s love or trauma bonding… And the fact is, a trauma bond will not transform into a healthy relationship, no matter how much the person being abused hopes so or tries to fix it. “But love doesn’t consist of you having to be in a cycle of being mentally diminished or physically hurt.”

Why do victims still love their abusers?

Some reasons you may still love your romantic partner despite their abusive behaviors might include: experiencing denial as a defense mechanism. being caught in the abuse cycle. having a personality disorder or attachment style that leads you to feel dependent on your partner.

How do you stop trauma bonding?

Breaking the bond

  1. Keep a journal. Writing down things that happened each day can help you begin to identify patterns and notice problems with behavior that may not have seemed abusive in the moment.
  2. Consider the relationship from another perspective.
  3. Talk to loved ones.
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What are trauma bonds and how do they work?

Put more simply, trauma bonds occur when we go through periods of intense love and excitement with a person followed by periods of abuse, neglect, and mistreatment. The cycle of being devalued and then rewarded over and over, works overtime to create a strong chemical and hormonal bond between a victim and his or her abuser.

Can you become trauma bonded to Your Abuser?

Anyone who is in an abusive relationship can become trauma bonded to their abuser, but people who experienced traumatic relationships as children may be more prone to these types of bonds.

Why do victims of abuse feel deeply bonded to their abusers?

The cycle of being devalued and then rewarded over and over, works overtime to create a strong chemical and hormonal bond between a victim and his or her abuser. This is why victims of abuse often describe feeling more deeply bonded to their abuser than they do to people who actually consistently treat them well.

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Can going no contact break a trauma bond?

Going no contact is one of the quickest ways to help break a trauma bond. When you cut off your abuser entirely, you end the up-down cycle that created the trauma bond in the first place.